We build too many walls and not enough bridges

Build a bridge and get over it.

How many times have we heard this and had absolutely no clue what it meant? Literally speaking, it’s much easier to build a wall than a bridge but then again you have to assess how long is this bridge or how high is this wall. That’s besides the point. While walls separate and protect us, bridges connect not just individuals but communities as well. Why do we feel that it’s easier to build walls as opposed to bridges? I believe that are animalistic tendencies instinctively tells us that we should always have our guard up, hence, the wall.

Walls not only protect us but they isolate us from all external people. When we build walls we need to understand that although nothing can come in, nothing can go out as well. We build walls because we don’t want to let just anyone into our lives, but once we find those that are worthy, they spend more time trying to break down that wall instead of learning about all the beautiful things you have to offer. Is that a bad thing? Eh, that’s subjective because it will depend on the person, the relationship (friendship, romantic, family, etc.), the situation, etc., so I wouldn’t be quick to say that it consistent across who you may ask. The intent of a wall is to act as a defensive mechanism so that you don’t let others inside. I’m actually all up for putting walls but I do believe that that there should be a door in which you’re able to let in (and out) whomever and whatever you please (couldn’t think of a better workaround). You should be mysterious and you should not let just anyone into your life because I’ve realized that the older you get, the less it becomes about quantity but more about quality. You want to be able to let those around you who deserve to be in your life inside and keep those who are not as deserving out.

On the other side of the spectrum we have bridges which typically take longer to form but the intent is to merge two sides in order to get one side to the other and vise versa. But why are so eager to build more walls and not enough bridges? It’s not supposed to be easy, it wouldn’t be worth it if was. Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither will these bridges. Yes, you are more susceptible to letting external people that you don’t want it, but what you gain is much more valuable than that. An amazing friend or even a spouse might be right in front of you and instead of bridging yourself with that other person, you’re secluding yourself and your feelings which can and most likely will be self- detrimental. Life is all about choices and calculated risks and I guarantee that you don’t want to miss out on a experience because of a “wall”. Your choices will be dependent on what you want and you should only worry about the things that you’re able to control. Everything that you’re not able to control is not worth your anxiety, stress, or worries. Life is complicated as it is, your choices are meant to mitigate that.